Konichiwa, Bitchez!

Here it is. When hair becomes epic, it looks like this:

I feel like I was born to have this hair. It's easy, perfect for my lazy ass, I can put a mohawk up in there!!!!!!

MY DREAM HAS COME TRUE! Every time I look in the mirror I feel like the bad ass chick that's inside me has come out. The color, the cut, the length, it's the most perfect haircut I've ever had. My sister declared that she's "a fan" of mine once she saw my new 'do. Some people looked incredibly shocked in school, declaring "WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!" and I've heard silly things like "Short hair is for boys" (ugh, this is worth a whole 'nother post because what is deemed "boyish" and "girly" is mainly a social construct) but to keep this post positive I won't start another rant about silly opinions. Plus there were also plenty of people who told me that it looks perfect on me. I will declare my love for me and my hair because I am a kick ass woman with hair to match with my personality. Also, I kind of dig the feeling of those really short hairs in the back of my neck. Just wanted to share the awesomeness with my lovely readers because you are awesome!

Peace out, lovelies! And don't let anybody ever tell you what you should wear or how you should cut your hair. To, once again in a post about hair, quote The Gaga: I'll die living just as free as my hair.

All the glory that I bear

It's been a couple of weeks now, but I got my hair cut short again! Though it was by no means long, it was too long for me. Short hair is who I am, yo. I know that a lot of people have the idea that caring about your haircut, or your appearance in general, is superficial. And you know what, it might just as well be. I couldn't care less whether people think that or not. But for the sake of writing, I'll try to convey why that shit ain't as vain as you might think it is.

With all the rules, deadlines and restrictions we have to deal with in life it only seems natural, especially if you're a creative individual, to try and be as restrictionless in the parts of life where you have complete control. Like with your appearance. And even that can be restricted by employers, schools and other party poopers. I understand. You can't be a tattooed freakazoid when you have to work with fragile old people who have heart attacks because their jell-o didn't turn up in time. You can't set a "bad" example for young children by turning up to teach a classroom in a band T and bright blue hair. Though I would've fucking loved that. I "understand". I don't agree, that's for sure. Being raised by crazy hippies, I think that everyone should just wear whatever the hell they want. I think that, only if we start to get used to people looking different from ourselves, we can stop judging people who look different from ourselves.

Before I turned eleven, I wanted to have long hair. Like a princess. The epitome of femininity. What all the boys like. After my puberty kicked in I slowly but surely moved towards my more individual taste, opinion and look. I got my nose pierced when I was twelve. I cut my hair short, together with my sister. I remember my youngest brother telling us that short hair wasn't pretty on girls. Especially not on someone with a round face, like mine. That was the first of many times I would think "Well, what if I don't actually WANT to be pretty? Maybe I just want to figure out who I am?". So I cut it. I loved it. It was my very first step into "I'm going to be whatever I want to be" territory. Because of reasons I will probably discuss in a future post, I had some years where there was no room for trying to really find myself or broadening my horizon. A couple of years older, I dyed my hair crazy colors and I'm still doing that. I never regretted a single haircut, dyejob or piercing (I could use a couple 'a more of the latter) because, like taking guitarlessons or picking up a book, it helps you to get to know who you are. Like getting that first tattoo I've been dreaming about. People tell you it'll be ugly. You'll regret it once you're older. But in the end of the day, you're just going to have to decide that for yourself. After having gone through some tough shit this past year, it's time to think about myself again. Finding out who I am. So I cut my hair. I'm thinking about that tattoo. I started reading more again. I finally started drawing after months of being completely inspirationless. Maybe getting some piano lessons. Buying other clothes. Doing things alone. You know what? I totally forgot about the fact that I'm actually kind of awesome. WITH AWESOME HAIR:

In the words of Gaga:

I've had enough, this is my prayer
That I'll die living just as free as my hair

OH and how do you like my new bloglook? I'm still kind of playing around but I really like it so far!

Comfy grunge and death

Well, with the promise of more blogposts in spring break and with spring break now officially over I've been a terrible blogger. I do have a damn good excuse, though.

My dad passed away, barely a week ago. It's very strange to say (or type) those exact words because the concept of death is so incredibly abstract and strange. I'm not going to bore you with details because they are terrible and laughable, ridiculous and disgusting, all at the same time. I feel incredibly confused and my brain is pretty messed up, especially since my relationship with my dad has been complicated for a while now. I might do a bigger post one day about the strange relationship I had with my dad. Maybe I can work through some emotional crap that way and maybe I can help some other people who are in tough situations with their parents too. Lord knows that stuff happens A LOT. While this spring break is probably the worst spring break one can ever have I did enjoy all the time I got to spend with my family, including my fathers sisters. I always loved stories about my parents when they were young and hearing stories about who my dad used to be reminded me of the good memories I have of him and the good parts of his personality. Since my dad had his first stroke his personality changed quite a bit. I was a little afraid that the only thing I could remember my dad by would be the shitty couple of years we had more recently but thanks to my older siblings, mother and aunts I'm slowly starting to remember again who that father was and how much I'm going to miss him. In the end I got to spend some beautiful last moments with him. including a moment where he told me he wished he would've taken better care of me, how beautiful I am and how much he was going to miss me. If there's any moment to be honest it's the moment you know you're going to be gone soon, right?

I won't be going to school this week because my brain is fucked up with all the emotions and I'm terribly unstable. One moment I feel like everything's okay and I can just get up tomorrow at five thirty in the morning and go to school. Five minutes later, however, I'm crying like a baby and feeling like I could punch someone so hard their ancestors would feel it (mulan reference). And again five minutes later I fall asleep on the couch. Emotions are exhausting, yo. I haven't lost my appetite and I'm able to sleep just fine so I guess that's something.

Random topic switch: I just wanted a comfy outfit to pair with my appetite for slightly gothic make up so I put on this dress and a comfy, thick cardigan I wear all the time. Hope you like it. If you have some interesting stories about your parents or a difficult relationship with them, don't hesitate to share it with me if you want to. And while I still have a couple of outfits to post with my long hair I'll warn you now: I have a banging new, short 'do. But for now: colorful pincurls! I will miss pincurling.

The girl with the animal hat

I'm going to introduce you lovely people to my little beastie: the wolf hat.

I got it from my sister last year for my birthday/christmas and I have been loving it deeply ever since. Not only because it's adorable and so strange I can wear it with everything and nothing but also because you get a lot of reactions from random people in the streets when you wear something like this. Some see it and think 'OMG so adorable!' and come up to me to say that I'm wearing the most awesome hat ever to be seen in the universe and some look at me like I'm mentally deranged. I once had this lovely little experience, I went to get something at our local supermarket and I came across a cranky cashier. It was around the holidays last year and he was helping customers with a kind of farmer with a toothache (lovely dutch expression :-D) smile but looked like he was cursing under his breath. Once it was my turn to pay for my groceries he looked at me, looked at my hat and suddenly a big smile appeared on his face. He laughed and said 'cool hat! lovely holidays to you!'. I don't ever care if he was laughing at me or not, it's nice to bring a smile to people's faces sometimes. And young kids are CRAZY about this hat. Once they see my hat I feel like a celebrity with everyone pointing and smiling at me.

I find it so strange that something so simple like a hat with a snout can cause such big reactions relative to the freaking hat. It always makes me think of the princess boy, just a boy who likes to wear dresses and princessy clothing. While to some people it's just kid in a dress, a lot of people go beserk saying that it's unnatural and of course, that his parents are "turning him gay" or what not. That it's "inappropriate" and that he should just "act normal" because he'll get bullied in school anyways. And I get so fucking pissed when I hear that statement. Change your behaviour because other people are too ignorant to deal with something that might be a little out of the ordinary. That's basically saying that, if the kid just wants to be who he/she is, there's gonna be bullying and it's his/her own fault! No, don't talk to the bullies, don't do anything in favor of acceptance. Be normal, that's crazy enough. BAH HUMBUG, to stay in the holiday spirit. I solemnly swear, right now, that if I ever have kids, they will freaking wear whatever the hell they want. I will argue and if necessary, fight for their right to be who they are. Shouldn't we all? Dresses, jeans, as long as it's a little season/age appropriate, go crazy kids! Boys in high heels, girls in combat boots, what's the harm in that? Apart from the feet of the boys, no harm done. And I sincerely hope that, if we want to prevent people being bullied, we talk about bullying, ignorance, insecurities, ... in stead of giving kids, who might look, think, talk a little different, a lesson on how to not BE bullied. We have to start early with this kind of thing, before you know it they grow up to be an adult who thinks that gay couples shouldn't be able to adopt kids because the kid will get bullied.

Now, the infamous animal hat:

It's also delightfully warm, by the way! OH and I hope you guys had a lovely christmas! :-)