Get your perfect bikini body in just 5 easy steps!

STEP ONE


Get a bikini/onepiece that fits nicely.

STEP TWO


Put it on.

STEP THREE


Forget all that shit that "magazines for women" have ever told you about having a so-called perfect body. It's bullshit. You are not less worthy of being scantily clad just because you have some more cellulite on your thighs or because you have tiny, saggy boobs. Honestly, once I started questioning the things that "Cosmopolitan" has been telling me since I turned twelve and decided to call shenanigans on their philosophy of "promoting" and "empowering" women while just as well telling them that, once they lose these extra ten pounds by standing on their head while flexing their butt muscles, they'll be a whole better person. Because, as they told me, let's be honest! Do you really want to go out looking like a whale in a tiny bikini? Are you sure you don't want to try this diet of eating nothing but crackers for 3 months together with these anti-cellulite creams that do absolutely nothing? OF COURSE YOU DO! Because the most important thing in life is to have the same body as Jessica Alba and you know it! You know it because we take celebs like Jessica Simpson and look upon her body as the most terrible fate you can suffer. SHIELD YOUR EYES FROM THIS COMLETELY NORMAL (and may I add attractive?) WOMAN!

Let's get our priorities straight here. You have a body so that you can survive comfortably and live your life. NOT because some species somewhere along the line of our ancestors decided that we needed this body so we could aspire to have a skinny body with one solicone boob and a triangular ass in this fab bikini Dolce & Gabbana designed. Also, that's not how evolution works, never you mind! We need to be strong and healthy enough so we can live our lives. That's what our body needs to be. Not something we punish or destroy because of some bizarre, delusional standard our society keeps setting. We need to wrap our heads around this because I can't tell you how much my confidence in my appearance has grown since I stopped caring about the "beauty" standards. Or anybody's standards but my own, for that matter. I'm healthy, I like the way I look and that's that. Now go paint, read a book, listen to your favorite music, watch a beautiful movie or have a meaningful discussion with your partner. There is so much more to life than worrying about the size of your butt.

STEP FOUR


Check yourself out in the mirror.

STEP FIVE


Admit it. You're a sexy mofo and your bikini is awesome. Now strut your ass out that door and share your awesomeness with the world.


CONCLUSION

If you have a body and a bikini/swimsuit: you have your perfect bikini body. Probably not according to John from around the corner who might like his girls thin and probably not according to Betty from upstairs who likes her girls meaty. There will always be people who might think you're unattractive and certainly imperfect. Newsflash: Perfection doesn't even exist. Maybe in physics or math but not when it comes to the human appearance. I'm sure everyone knows that, what society perceives as beauty, changes every two decades or so. In the 90's, a muscular, slender body with big boobs was prefered. For most of the 00's a skinny, almost childish body has been seen as the most attractive body to have. We all know that back in the 50's and 60's, an hourglass figure with pointy boobs was the way we needed to look. Which, by the way, wasn't a better thing than it is now. We might think that it's terrible that most of us have to starve ourselves to come close to the contemporary ideal body and it must've been much better back in the good ol' 50's. Than think about all the naturally skinny girls and the bigger girls. The skinny girls needed to wear all kinds of padding because they felt inadequate. Corsets had to be worn by everyone to create that "perfect" hourglass figure. I can tell you as a girl with a natural hourglassy shape: your hips aren't perfectly round and your waist isn't supposed to go in that much or even in that spot. An obsession with youth has been going on in the last years and it's just crazy. You do not need to shave your legs or get a bikiniwax or shake off cellulite because someone decided we all want to keep looking like we haven't hit puberty yet. In the 70's it was all the rage to be hairy! It's all so incredibly subjective.

Please don't let these crazy ideas of perfection stand in the way of yourself. Just love yourself for who you are and spread the body positive message! I challenge everyone of you to post a bikini/swimsuit picture of yourself on your blog and be positive about yourself. NOW, you can't talk the talk without walking the walk so I present you, my loves: little ol' me in one of my awesome swimsuits. I got it from my sister who bought it at Think Twice vintage last year but didn't feel like she filled up the suit the way it needed to be filled up. So here I am, filling it up! :-D

The colors flatter my ever-milkwhite skin to no end, I love it to pieces. BY THE WAY I totally have blue hair and blue eyebrows these days. I color my eyebrows in with some mix of navy, green, brown and black to make it look a little more natural and not superblue.

Hope I see you guys in a bikini soon and see you on the flip side!

Make over

I'm sorry I haven't made blogpost in a while (again!) but I've just been dealing with me and my emotions and it's hella tiring. I haven't been able to concentrate or go to school and I have moments when I just feel like I could fall through the earth because of some big ass brick I feel in my stomach. Some days are better than others but the feeling never goes away. I'm hoping it will. If it was only a little bit of a sad feeling that you could get rid of by crying and getting a hug from your boyfriend. But it's not. This is a different kind of sadness, something I've never felt before. On the really bad moments it's almost immobilizing. And I worry. I worry about not being able to do my exams in June because I can't concentrate for the life of me. I worry that I'll keep feeling this feeling for ever. I worry that my boyfriend will dump/cheat on me because I have massive fear of abandonement issues right now. Most of the time I just feel one of those worries but when they all come together it SUCKS BALLS. Luckily I think my boyfriend loves me so that's one thing. But the rest is still scary. Now I will awkwardly change this depressing post into a hair post. Life is awkward sometimes. I can't give my poor readers depressing posts and no eyecandy!

After having my awesome and eternally flattering bob-haircut for two years in a row (which is a long time for me, I've been switching haircuts and lengths a lot since I turned twelve or something) I started lusting after short hair again. I'm always lusting after short hair. There's something about it, if it's the right short cut that frames a face the right way... I find it incredibly attractive. Haircuts like these always make me want to chop my hair immediately:

I want to marry the Michelle Williams picture. How adorable is she?! Anyhoo, I don't keep lusting very long. I'm a do-er! So peoples, here is my new 'do!

I'm so happy with it, I found an awesome new hairdresser thanks to my sister and he did an amazing job. It's exactly what I asked for and I feel awesome with it. And I still have enough hair to play around with my signature bright hairdyes! How do you feel about short hair? Padapapapa, are you lovin' it? :-D Also, check out my awesome eye make-up!:

My 100 shadow palette is one of the best things ever. And a little tip for girls who want to chop their hair but are afraid of what their boys are going to say: they'll nag before you go to the hairdresser but when you come back they'll just love the fact that they can see your face even better. :-D

Comfy grunge and death

Well, with the promise of more blogposts in spring break and with spring break now officially over I've been a terrible blogger. I do have a damn good excuse, though.

My dad passed away, barely a week ago. It's very strange to say (or type) those exact words because the concept of death is so incredibly abstract and strange. I'm not going to bore you with details because they are terrible and laughable, ridiculous and disgusting, all at the same time. I feel incredibly confused and my brain is pretty messed up, especially since my relationship with my dad has been complicated for a while now. I might do a bigger post one day about the strange relationship I had with my dad. Maybe I can work through some emotional crap that way and maybe I can help some other people who are in tough situations with their parents too. Lord knows that stuff happens A LOT. While this spring break is probably the worst spring break one can ever have I did enjoy all the time I got to spend with my family, including my fathers sisters. I always loved stories about my parents when they were young and hearing stories about who my dad used to be reminded me of the good memories I have of him and the good parts of his personality. Since my dad had his first stroke his personality changed quite a bit. I was a little afraid that the only thing I could remember my dad by would be the shitty couple of years we had more recently but thanks to my older siblings, mother and aunts I'm slowly starting to remember again who that father was and how much I'm going to miss him. In the end I got to spend some beautiful last moments with him. including a moment where he told me he wished he would've taken better care of me, how beautiful I am and how much he was going to miss me. If there's any moment to be honest it's the moment you know you're going to be gone soon, right?

I won't be going to school this week because my brain is fucked up with all the emotions and I'm terribly unstable. One moment I feel like everything's okay and I can just get up tomorrow at five thirty in the morning and go to school. Five minutes later, however, I'm crying like a baby and feeling like I could punch someone so hard their ancestors would feel it (mulan reference). And again five minutes later I fall asleep on the couch. Emotions are exhausting, yo. I haven't lost my appetite and I'm able to sleep just fine so I guess that's something.

Random topic switch: I just wanted a comfy outfit to pair with my appetite for slightly gothic make up so I put on this dress and a comfy, thick cardigan I wear all the time. Hope you like it. If you have some interesting stories about your parents or a difficult relationship with them, don't hesitate to share it with me if you want to. And while I still have a couple of outfits to post with my long hair I'll warn you now: I have a banging new, short 'do. But for now: colorful pincurls! I will miss pincurling.

Pre birthday outfit post!

DARLINGZ, Imma be eighteen years old tomorrow, december 9th! I still have to finish my birthday cake with my boyfriend (no, he's not inside the cake!) so it's just a quick post! I'm a little tired from sniffing up all the sugary cake aromas. :-D Since two years ago we make a devils food cake for my birthday (and sometimes for my boy too), a super big, heavy chocolatey cake. I once saw it on Martha Stewart (don't judge!) and I immediately told my boyfriend that that was my dream cake. I enjoy it every time we make it but we only make it twice a year (once for me and once for my man) so that's just enough to not get bored with the taste. I already got myself a wide angle lens for my birthday, I have been saving up my money for a while to get a new lens and I couldn't be happier. I have so much more new things to try out now, photography wise. I'm going to have loads of fun, trust me. Tomorrow I'll get presents from my boyfriend and mom, I'm curious to see what they bought me! I got some fake bright green doc martens from my sis and a gorgeous photography book from one of my brothers. My oldest brother is always very smart and just asks me what I want, every year, so I know he'll get me something glorious. He lives in the U.S. so when it comes to buying presents it's a pretty handy deal. Only when it comes to buying presents though, apart from that it's a shitty deal to have part of your family living somewhere halfway across the world. Anyhoo, I'll do a birthday post soon with all my presents and my cake!

It's really stormy here in Belgium right now and my mom always told me that the night I was born was crazy stormy too. I'm hoping for a nice sunny day tomorrow so I can go out and play with my lens! Fingers crossed!

Looking back I'm SO glad I cut my hair again. I loved my little pincurls but my short sharp do is so much more me. Gorgeous haircolors though. I'm still in love with my bright hair. Kids, a word of advice: Don't ever believe your parents when they say you'll grow tired of bright hair. It just doesn't happen. :-D

Let the sunshine in

The day I wore this outfit... the weather was inredible. I didn't need a jacket, the sun was shining and there was a nice crisp breeze that I love in spring and fall. Most of the time I love mixing up my colors and prints but sometimes I just love to be comfy and feminine and twirly. And when I want to be all those things, I go for sneakers, dresses and a cool belt. And tights of course, when it's a little chilly. I don't know how often I've said it but MAN this indian summer is well, good and very long! It has hardly rained and the cloudiness was very minimal, especially for Belgium! And it's already november. It's crazy man, just crazy. I don't mind it! But I remember it was already snowing around this time last year. So weird. My hair is dyed differently by the way but in the coming posts they'll still be old and muddy :-D. I'll try to work through these outfits a little quicker because I'm curious about what you guys will think of mah new do. Also, my hair is getting really long. I don't mind it but once in a while I dream about all the cute short hairdo's I used to have. I really love the feeling of the wind in my neck and ears, is that weird? :-D I just remember that, when coming from the hairdresser. jumping on my bike, I always loved the feeling of the wind. Oh well, I might go to the hairdresser one of these weeks. Not to get a super short do but I might get my hair a little tweaked here and there. Shorter at the back, perhaps.

Hope you're having a wonderful day and have fun in the weekend!